Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Shadows and Challenges

Shadow Body in Garden in June

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Walked into my garden this morning with my camera.  The air was fresh and clear
with the scent of hollyhocks. I began shooting pictures and noticed how vibrant my
shadow appeared in the shots. The images led me to "place" the shadow in various
areas of my garden, snapping away as the combination of plant life and dark,
flat human form intermingled.  I was intrigued with the mix.  My mind has been stuck
in the shadows as I have struggled to accept my mothers death and live my life without
her.  This and other challenges, the last couple of weeks, have sent me out to work in the
garden to feel peace and physical life. The appearance of the shadows in the garden
was a wonderful surprise that gave pictorial form to my feelings and reminded me
how artists use the visual to clarify and define their world. 



Many Shadows
Two of the "incidents" that "shook up" my week involved animals and art education.  Ziggy
Starman's new farrier came to trim his feet and actually "butchered" all four hooves.  Zigs
feet were trimmed too short and uneven.  Think about how it would feel if someone
clipped all 10 toenails really really short. Lots of pain!!  The next day Zigs was barely able
to walk.  I was frantic and a kind neighbor came over to help.  She asked me if I had any
horse boots  and I remembered I had a pair of Easy Boots in the tack room. We placed
them on his feet.  He "dinked" around in them for a while, but quickly became acclimated.

My next problem was finding a capable farrier to assess the damage to my horse's hooves.
On-line I went and discovered Claudia, a barefoot trimmer and Natural Horsemanship
Trainer.  I called her at 10:30 that evening thinking I would leave a desperate message.  She
picked up the phone and we spoke for an hour.  A few days later she was evaluating Ziggy's
feet and placing on new boots that were a better fit.  He immediately began to walk well
with the new footwear.  The older boots were too small and created some cuts on his
heel ball (not a good situation) and now I had a second problem to address. The next day
Claudia called and  instructed me to wrap his hooves with vet wrap to protect the hoof ball
and then place his new shoes back on his feet.  It had been years since I had to
wrap Ziggy's feet and I knew that one should never wrap too tight or too loose.  There is
a definite "art" to hoof wrapping and I went about the task with some trepidation.  Vet wrap
is a thin flexible stretchy material that clings to itself as one wraps.  Mine was old and very
sticky (think fly paper) and my fingers were not obeying brain signals.  After 3 "variations"
of wrapping and taking shoes on and off, I conquered my humiliation and called my
neighbor again.  She demonstrated how to apply the vet wrap firmly and neatly.   On went
the shoes for the 4th time that day and I felt a great relief.  Living with a horse is a very
humbling experience and large learning curve - which I tell myself everyday. 


New boots

My other rather stressful and disastrous  experience happened during an interview for
an art teaching position that involved a duel credit course in a terrific charter school.
I had been looking forward to teaching in this school for a long time and had subbed
and taught a workshop for them during the last few years.  The staff and administration
at the school are lively, progressive, and very attentive to their students.  My difficulty
involved an interview at a 2 year college that would administer the college credits
to the high schoolers.  I had to be approved by this school for the teaching position.
My original interview was rescheduled for a later date and I was told one other person
(a full-time art instructor), with whom I was an acquaintance, would be at the interview.
I was asked to bring student artwork and present my own work at that time.  No other in-
formation was given to me concerning the interview.  I assumed, then, that it would be
rather informal.

I was almost late to the interview since I had great trouble finding the correct building
(on the not well- marked campus) and the building name was not formally given in the
E-Mail directions.  Arriving in the correct office by sheer will power, I was relieved
the Dean was in a meeting and would see me in a few minutes. That gave me some time
to compose myself after my "run around" the campus and worry about time.

As I was ushered into the conference room, I was surprised to see 4 people sitting around
the table.  I took my seat at the head and was told that each person would be asking me
questions.  I was not asked to talk freely and found myself sitting in a very formal panel
group with a very specific agenda and set of questions.   As the questioning began I looked
out onto very stony faces.  My answers and manner of speaking and thinking were not met
with satisfaction as the interviewer continued to "hammer" at me to be more specific about
outcomes and details. 

I have been in many interviews  both formal and less formal and understood that I was
being asked to use a particular language that I call "education speak" that was developed
during the "No Child Left Behind" debacle.  What the group wanted to hear was was an
echo of the very specific words they were programed to use to describe how one would
go about teaching an introductory art course.  I smiled and remained cordial. I spoke and
spoke, and talked about learning process and series of tasks each student must master for
explicit art problems. My language was my own and more nuanced and came directly
from all my many many experiences and years of teaching art in a variety of venues.  No
one heard my explanations because they were listening for the correct educational "buzz
words".

Rather abruptly, the Dean asked to see my student work which was projected on a screen
from a computer.  Each piece of work was listed under a class title such as Drawing I,
Painting I etc.  There seemed to be some confusion about the headings since I was asked
which courses were introductory.  I gave class assignment and media information about
each piece of art work.  The work was very solid and strong and I was proud of how my
students executed the assignments.  Not a word was mentioned about the high quality of
work.  I was asked to show examples of linear perspective and I had some wonderful land-
scape paintings from Painting I that exhibited deep perspective space. The panel wanted
to see perspective drawing and  I made the point that I was not told to bring specific
assignments and did not have them in the large number and variety of work I had put on
the disk.  I have over 20 years of student work and I picked and chose some of the best
examples to present. 

When I walked out the door of the conference room, I was relieved to be free of the
pounding dissatisfaction and unpleasant atmosphere of the room.   I was taught by my
mentor, Dr. Phyliss Kuffler at Rhode Island School of Design, that the most important
aspect of teaching was the communication and trust one sets up with  the students  from
the initial meeting.  Learning would then follow.  Dr. Kuffler was a gracious, warm, and
giving teacher who demanded the best from her students.  Through years of teaching
and discussions with my colleagues I discovered there are many styles of teaching.
Each instructor develops their own methodology as they tackle subject matter.  I
teach with humor, passion, and knowledge and believe the passing on of information is
a complex and personal experience that comes from a teacher's need to help, inform,
and desire success for their students.  As an artist I am constantly reading, exploring
and making work in my studio. My own experiences with my process of working
filter into my teaching.  Dr. Kuffler taught me that the best teachers are also continual
learners.

Needless to say,  I received an E-Mail during the next few days that thanked me for my
time and commented "While you clearly have many strengths, you did not meet a couple
of critical requirements for hiring for our part-time pool.  One of the aspects we evaluate
when we interview for our  pool (is) the ability to clearly articulate the fundamental
principles/learning outcomes for introductory courses.  Additionally, these articulated
outcomes should be linked to the content emphases and teaching approaches in our
introductory courses.  At this time, we are unable to approve you to teach ......."  I was
not surprised but sad that teachers of art today are required (in many institutions) to
teach from rigid scripted notions of educational talking points rather than their
own very valuable and knowledgeable experiences.

As I look forward to other types of work and challenges, I feel fierce about my earned
experiences and look forward to new venues for my art and knowledge.  The shadows
are a wonderful surprise and articulation for me of how artists continue to use instinct
and wonder to traverse the world. 


Continuing On With My Life



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