"Art is the Proper Task of Life," Friederich Nietzsche

Home of Artist Rick Phelps


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As I peruse through my thought processes about how I have lived my life after 50+
years, I have realized that every decision I have made was based upon my ability to
make my work and live near an art center.  Moving often through the years, my
first priority was having a studio space and living near other artists.  All my
decisions were based on my life as an artist first and foremost.  Nietzsche's quote
really sums up my and other artist's actions stating "art is the proper task of life".
During the last few weeks I had the great pleasure of visiting two artist friends in
their homes and studios who have also lived life through their art.

Artists Rick Phelps and Christy Hengst are not acquainted, but both live their lives
creating work that helps inform how they think, develop ideas, and interact with their
world.  Both Rick and Christy's homes are spaces where art resides and breathes as
part of life. I fully appreciate how both artists have a similar outlook on living a good
life through art that was exhibited by their environments and thought processes.
I received permission to write a bit about each artist for this weeks post. 

Christy's Home with daughter, Eliza, and Puppy

                                                                                            

Christy Hengst is a sculptor who works with clay and mixed mediums.  I was fortunate
to be able to take a private "Silkscreening on Clay Workshop" with Christy last week that
was great fun, informative, and exciting.  Her studio in Santa Fe is filled with her art
and tools for working with clay, screening, wax and other mediums.  She has developed
her screening on clay through much trial and error and has become a master of the
process.

Inside Christy's Studio

For the last two years Christy has created a large series of porcelain silkscreened birds
with personal imagery that have traveled to more than 60 sites around the world.
Words, letters, and images adorn each individual bird and no two are alike.  The instal-
lations were set up to allow interaction with people and other creatures.  Christy's web site, 
http://www.christyhengst.com, has a video and many images of the birds "roosting" in
parks, harbors, underwater, and along the sea coast, to name a few locations.  The birds on
site are stunning and surprising to the unsuspecting visitor.  I enjoyed seeing the birds up-
close and personal in Chrisity's studio.  The variations of information and writings were
intriguing and kept me investigating each non-feathered friend.

Christy's Birds Gather Outside her Studio

  
Bill and I were invited to Christy's house to meet her husband, Helmut, a blacksmith,
and children, Eliza and Oliver.  I had a wonderful time exploring the old adobe/frame
home with Christy as my guide.  The house is a labyrinth of rooms ornamented with
Christy's screened tiles and Helmut's blacksmithing skills.  It is a wonderfully
warm and inviting home created with loving care by two artists who have used
their skill and talent to surround themselves with art.

Large Hot Tub with Christy's Design

Bathroom Floor of Christy's Home

Rick Phelps lives in an Earthship home just outside of Santa Fe with his partner, Alex.
His studio, just inside the entry door, is filled with magical creatures that depart from
doll, animal, and shaped forms (that create the inner structures) into winged, stacked or
hybrid beings. His main medium is paper mache which reinforces his belief in recycling
materials.   

Rick's World

Rick's creatures and ornamental shapes fill the Earthship from top to bottom.  One of
my favorite rooms was the bathroom.  Peeking in the doorway was an incredible
experience as I discovered a large pod shape hanging from the ceiling and all
kinds of greenery in pots giving the space a hot house feel along with the plastic
back wall. Walking through the Earthship gives one a feeling of Marti Gras, ancient
dwelling, and ceremony . At this time, Rick is working hard to finish work for his show
at Cafe Pasqual's Gallery in the Fall.    The link to Rick's web site at Cafe Pasquals is:
http://pasquals.com/The_Gallery/Rick_Phelps-Paper_Mache/index.html

Bathroom Space                                   Rick Working in his Studio Area

Rick and Alex are both gardeners and Rick has designed various gardens in Santa Fe.
Surrounding the Earthship is wonderful vegetation and many of Rick's outdoor sculptures.
They also have an indoor greenhouse in the Earthship.  Every corner of Rick and
Alex's house is filled with the surprise of "recycler meets magician".

Outside the Earthship

Indoor Greenhouse and Horse Sculpture Outside

As I ponder the world of art and beyond, I am comforted by the fact that artists
such as Christy and Rick are working from a sense of honesty, heart, and the rigor
of creation. Their lives reflect their art and their art reflects their lives.  Living as
an artist is a necessary life to many of us who must work from our creative minds.
One of my favorite quotes is from Duchamp who said:  "I'm nothing else but an
artist, I'm sure, and delighted to be"

Christy's web site is:  http://www.christyhengst.com
Rick's web site is:  http://pasquals.com/The_Gallery/Rick_Phelps-Paper_Mache/index.html
Also: my interview with the Art Book Guy for August is on  http://artbookguy.com
And visit new blogger friend, Valerie Story:  http://www.valeriestorey.com/

Duck, Duck, Duck, Goat - Finding Peace and Art in My World

Garden Duck and Me

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Trying to comprehend the nature of violent acts we humans continue to inflict upon
each other in the 21st century is beyond my understanding and personal nature.
Colorado, the latest tragedy, stands along a list of shootings we have experienced
in recent years in this country. As a supposed leader of the world and civilization,
the US continues to engage in the brutal wars in the Mideast and started two in the
last ten years.  Deluged with the awful events of the weekend from newspapers,
internet and TV, I began to think about how one creates peace and harmony in one's
life. 

Garden Duck

I decided to take my camera out with me for my "muck-up" and morning feeding
with the "boys"- a time that gives me much peace and starts the day with the rising
sun, fresh air, and welcoming four legged "folks".  Along the way to my barn I noticed
Garden Duck.  Garden Duck was left by the last inhabitants of my house and
I have enjoyed his plastic presence in my front yard.   So picking up GD, I trudged
to the barn to feed.  The shadows of me and Duck against my barn caught my eye
immediately and I began to snap shots.  Duck was very cooperative.  I had to stop
taking photos to actually feed Ziggy Starman, Finian, Rainbow, Abbakiss, and
Cloud, because they were hungry and looked like they were about to call the "crazy
people" police and report me. We had our usual goat crowding and vieing for a
scratch and recognition before I could return to my camera.  Such a wonderful way
to start a day.  Then I took Garden Duck and reentered the corral.  We posed ourselves
with my manure rake as munching was heard all around the barnyard.  I love the sound
of crunching and munching because it means everyone is well and nourished.

Garden Duck, Me, Rake

Leaving Duck outside the barnyard so very curious goats would not move him around
the pen, I picked up my manure fork to start mucking and began to dance and hum. I
was not "Singing in the Rain", but "Humming in the Sun".  I never know what I will
do in the corral because I am so happy around the animals.

Dance with Manure Fork

My corral is a large U shape starting with the barn area. I pick up my wheel barrow
throw my manure fork inside and "roll".   As I walk and clean up  horse poop from
the hard clay soil, I am followed by my dogs Rooe and Cooper.  My mind wanders to
all areas of my life.  I think about my mother and how much I miss her and sing a
refrain from a song that was written about her in her garden for her memorial by my
sisters dear friends, Ingrid and Michelle of "Dinosaur Rock".  I remember the last
fragmented conversation I had with my Dad who will soon be moved to a facility for
dementia patients. I listen to a songbird singing on the wire above me and give out my
own whistle.  I watch Cooper race the neighbor's dog along the fence and hear Ziggy
crunch on his pellets, eating from a bucket further down the corral.  I think about my
work and studio and the experimentation of new directions I am tackling.  The sun
begins to heat the air and the temperature rises as I continue my work.  Rooe barks at
a passing rabbit and Abbakiss gives some concerned "baas" as he watches me move
down the corral from his pen where he and Cloud are having their breakfast.   The
animals are at peace and feeling content which settles my mind.  

The Goat Tree

I stop by what I call "the goat tree" which is a juniper with bits of green left only on the top.
The goats have chewed the tree as far as they can stand on two hooves.  Ziggy usually
brushes against the tree to scratch an itch.  The dry grey branches make an interesting
sculpture in space.  I continue on picking up Ziggy's food bucket and checking the water
trough towards the end of the corral.  I glance up at magnificent South Mountain to inspect
the weather from the North and enjoy the view as I pass Ziggy and Destiny's (horse
girlfriend) shade tree.  The tree has a flat underline where the two horses have eaten the
leaves as far as they can reach with their arched necks.

South Mountain and Ziggy's Shade Tree

Walking back up the corral, my wheel barrow is heavy and the air is warm.  The dogs
follow me and I am ready to dump the poop in the yard on my back west property.  I
maneuver my wheel barrow through a small side gate and just barely manage to sneak
through before Abbakiss, who likes to "visit" the other yard, barges the gate.  Return-
ing to the corral with an empty barrow gives me great satisfaction each day with a
task well done. The "boys" gather around me and the empty wheel barrow.  Ziggy
is busy with the serious task of eating in the barn. 

Me, Abbakiss and Wheel Barrow

I untangle myself from the goats, give Ziggy a pat, and place the wheel barrow by the
side of the barn where Cloud will soon become the "captain" of the barrow, jumping
inside to command from a position of height.  I exit the gate and place my manure
fork by the barn for the next adventure with "mucking up".  I pick up Garden Duck
and replace him in the garden and go off to eat my breakfast.  All is peaceful at the
ranchito. 

Duck back in Garden

See my interview on artbookguy.com  Check out posts and blogs.  This is a great site
for art news.

Edgewood Summer Eve

Looking West towards my garden and the Sandia Mountains

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Summer in New Mexico is a magical time that lengthens the days and moves into
golden light during the evening hours.  I had spent this particular Sunday with my
partner, Bill, digging a trench around my studio that flooded with the last monsoon
downfall.  Hot and dirty work, I was relieved to take a shower and have some dinner.
But the light and garden beckoned me outdoors again with my camera to wander my
property and take pictures.

I began snapping pictures of my front garden but soon decided I needed to ex-
periment with other ideas.  My truck caught my eye and I had one of my "Ah Ha"
moments as I looked through my camera pointed at the truck windows and
responded to the imagery of the reflections that captured wonderful dualities of
figure, landscape and truck anomalies.  Next I shot the chrome behind the side mirrors
that also distorted shape and image. Other parts of the truck also created various piece-
meal parts of me and what was behind me.  I was happy.

Truck Fun!

More Truck Fun!

Moving on to the back of my property, I explored the flowers, mint, lilac, and pond.  Tall
mullin, lambs ears, salvia, hollyhock, red hot pokers, and my stone forms begged for attent-
ion from my camera.  Every few weeks Bill and I take a trip over to our friends, Deb and
Chuck to haul more rocks from their property to ours.  They have an abundance of granite
that permeates their land and ends up on ours.  I love arranging each rock shape in the
garden. The rocks tend to disappear as the garden grows in Spring and Summer.

                                           Red Hot Pokers and Pond                                                   

Back Garden and Pond

As I was taking pictures, my goats and horse came over to the fence to beg for a "nibble"
of greens and watch my peculiar activities.  My dogs were also afoot but hard to photo-
graph.  The evening shadows appeared as I meandered over to scratch some heads and
turn my camera to the barn yard. 

Barnyard

Abbakiss and Ziggy Starman

As the sun continued to slip lower in the vast sky, my shadows "accosted" me.  I began
to pose on my house wall.   I felt like I was in an old silent movie show.

My "Movie Show"

It was a lovely evening in Edgewood.

The Art Book Guy, Michael K. Corbin, and I Chat

Chatting

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Michael Corbin, the Art Book Guy, has begun a chat with me about my work. The chat will culminate in an interview that will be featured on the Art Book Guy site.   Michael's site is www.artbookguy.com and features interviews with artists and much more.  Please visit his site. He has written 2 books, The Art of Everyday Joe:  A Collector's Journal and Art for The People:  A Collector's Journal.




MICHAEL: Hello Diane, Your work, especially the most recent mixed media works on your website seem almost allegorical.  I see strong narrative and perhaps some symbols with strong emphasis on female subjects.  What's the story here?

The Teacher, Marina Semynova 1, 2, 3

DIANE:  

Hi Michael, thanks so much for taking an interest in my work.   You have asked a wonderful first question with many pertinent facets that pertain to my work.  To preface, I am very interested in the complex qualities of humanity that help create our stories and lives such as hope, compassion, kindness, wonder, passion, honesty, fear, doubt, compulsion, discipline, and perseverance to name a few.  Ideas may come from a moment in time that I glimpse, a personal connection to my own history, a story I need to explore, an idea that "tugs" at me, powerful imagery or specific events.   I never quite know what will "appear" as suitable topic, but my curiosity and intuition take me to many sources.   As our world becomes more technological (which allows us to communicate more often with others but in a less intimate manner) I find myself seeking more humane and complex interactions and explanations.   The "hurriedness" and shorthand of the technological world often deletes nuance, character, and complexity.   Those are the qualities I attempt to include in my work. 

Children in Peril Series

The beginnings of my interest in stories that often emerge as a  "fragmented narrative" state, started with my  "Children In Peril" that was developed within a nine-year period (1997-2006).  The work revolved around the story of Lisa Steinberg, the abused, illegally adopted and murdered child of Joel Steinberg and Hedda Nussbaum.  The story made national news but I was stunned by the front page New York Post image of Lisa smiling at the viewer.  Her face stole my heart and the work began and culminated in three series "The Lisa Series", "The Nightmare Series", and "The Throw-A-Ways".   I was living in Hoboken, NJ at the time.  Opening my thoughts, passions, and empathy to the world in the work began a manner of working that allowed me to act, react, explore stories and investigate my thoughts and feelings about issues and subjects. It was during this period that I began to use symbol, metaphor, and less literal signifiers in context to develop a visual poetry which you have described as allegory to my viewers.

Publicity Photo for The Eglevsky Ballet Company, Me on the right

The story of the new mixed-media works comes from my curiosity and perseverance of images of Russian ballerina, Marina Semynova, after reading an obituary in The New York Times about her death at 102.   My connection to Marina comes from my own history as a dancer in New York.  My fascination with Russia began with my grandfather (who was born in Russia/Poland, depending on which country claimed his village) who told me many times that one of our relatives was a painter/poet in the court of the last Russian Tsar.  I was fascinated with the culture of Russia as a child and later collected a serious collection of books on Russian dance.  I grew up in and around New York City.  Art was always important and my grandmother took me to the museums when I began to walk so I was very affected by art at an early age.  But my love of ballet began at age 8 when I begged for lessons after accompanying a friend to ballet school.  By the time I was 11, my mother had enrolled me in the Andre Eglevsky Ballet School on Long Island.  Andre Eglevsky was a Russian dancer who had starred in The Russe de Monte Carlo in Europe and The New York City Ballet with George Balanchine.  Within 2 years I was in The Andre Eglevsky Ballet Company dancing on stage.  I was also enrolled every summer at The School of American Ballet, The New York City Ballet's feeder school in Manhattan.  Many of my teachers were ex-Russian dancers from the Bolshoi.  Andre used to host the Bolshoi Ballet at his home when they came to America.  It was the era of the Cold War and it was such a privilege to be able to see the Russian dancers in NYC.  My Russian teachers left a large impression on my life because they were so passionate, heartfelt, focused and honest about the art of ballet and teaching.  I left ballet at 16 because my body could not take the physical rigors and turned back to fine art, but my love of dance has never ended.  

Your question about an emphasis of female subjects in my work began with my experiences as a dancer.  The dance world was one of limited arenas that demonstrated the strength and power of women in the arts as both teachers and artists.  I remember sitting at my desk in my room at home on Long Island as a teen, wondering why the history of art included very few great women artists to model and emulate.   My later years as an art student and artist found the world to be very steeped in patriarchal power with little room for female endeavors and spirit.   Therefore my intuitive choice to use the female figure as a symbol of artistry, strength, and learning redirects the balance of my early inquiries and gaps of information about the female as a strong artistic figure.  

Marina Semyonova Teaching in Russia

When I read Marina Semynova's obituary in the NYT's I was intrigued and curious about her life.  I googled her name and found old films of her dancing and teaching on U-Tube, but could not download the film until further inquires to a computer savvy person told me about software (from Iceland of all places) that would allow access.  I bought the software, downloaded all the films I could find into I-Movie.  Watching the films gave me that "tingle" of excitement that precedes the beginning of new work.   What interested me greatly was Marina in her 60's or 70's teaching a solo from "The Black Swan" to a young dancer in a bare dance studio in Russia.  The music, the choreography, the atmosphere of the dance studio felt so familiar and eerie as I was looking "down time" to another era (50's or 60's).   My subject was before me - the aging teacher who had been the dancer and remained the dancer in her frumpy black dress and pumps moving exquisitely through space as she demonstrated various steps and sequences. She had great respect from her student and showed an empathetic willingness to pass on her art to the younger generation.   I watched the film many times as I decided which positions would be dynamic on the page.  Learning how to move the frames from I-Movie to I-Tunes to Quick-time and finally Photoshop for printing was a large learning curve and often I just worked from the computer in my studio on stop-gap.  

I had been working in encaustic for the last 10 years, but found that the medium was not allowing me enough freedom to explore my ideas fully.   I decided to work with acrylic grounds and mediums, which would allow me to build up the surface with pigment, pastel, graphite, marker, and other media.  I chose to use heavy paper, (50"x38") and hang the work like a rug hanging with a rod in the back.  I created pockets sewing heavy 3" ribbon on the top back area of the paper and inserted thin flat metal strips that could hang the pieces.  The task I set up for the work was to place three figures of Marina on each paper that composed a moment of movement.   Color has always been an element of wonder and enchantment for me and as the piece developed, the color became a vivid part of the environment and atmosphere, reflecting light and motion.  As I worked I realized I needed to add the element of pattern to move around and into each piece to integrate space and figure. The patterning became an important element and signifier of the magic of the theater backdrops, lighting, and textural costumes.   I began to spray paint through all types of lace and material to create repeated design.  Pattern also reminded me of the attire of my Russian teachers who each had their own style of dressing for class.   The 3 pieces were worked over a period of almost 2 years.  My final presentation of the work removed the rod as a hanging device and adhered the paper pieces to Plexiglas with a 2-inch area around the drawing as frame. On the back of the clear frame area are glued 2 layers of delicate material that appear to create a soft floating frame.  

Final edging with Plexi-Glass and Material Underlay

I was fascinated and interested that you attached the word allegory to my work.  I had not thought of the pieces in those terms and I feel you have given me an interesting angle to consider as I assess the work.  Researching the word allegory on Wikipedia I found allegory is described as "a device used to present an idea, principle or meaning, which can be presented in literary form, such as a poem or novel, in musical form, such as composition or lyric, or in visual form, such as in painting or drawing ......... As an artistic device, an allegory is a visual symbolic representation."  Marina is the visual symbol for me of a strong, vibrant, artist and teacher who lived a life of art and sharing of art.   How great is that??  

Shadows and Challenges

Shadow Body in Garden in June

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Walked into my garden this morning with my camera.  The air was fresh and clear
with the scent of hollyhocks. I began shooting pictures and noticed how vibrant my
shadow appeared in the shots. The images led me to "place" the shadow in various
areas of my garden, snapping away as the combination of plant life and dark,
flat human form intermingled.  I was intrigued with the mix.  My mind has been stuck
in the shadows as I have struggled to accept my mothers death and live my life without
her.  This and other challenges, the last couple of weeks, have sent me out to work in the
garden to feel peace and physical life. The appearance of the shadows in the garden

was a wonderful surprise that gave pictorial form to my feelings and reminded me
how artists use the visual to clarify and define their world. 

Many Shadows

Two of the "incidents" that "shook up" my week involved animals and art education.  Ziggy
Starman's new farrier came to trim his feet and actually "butchered" all four hooves.  Zigs
feet were trimmed too short and uneven.  Think about how it would feel if someone
clipped all 10 toenails really really short. Lots of pain!!  The next day Zigs was barely able
to walk.  I was frantic and a kind neighbor came over to help.  She asked me if I had any
horse boots  and I remembered I had a pair of Easy Boots in the tack room. We placed
them on his feet.  He "dinked" around in them for a while, but quickly became acclimated.

My next problem was finding a capable farrier to assess the damage to my horse's hooves.
On-line I went and discovered Claudia, a barefoot trimmer and Natural Horsemanship
Trainer.  I called her at 10:30 that evening thinking I would leave a desperate message.  She
picked up the phone and we spoke for an hour.  A few days later she was evaluating Ziggy's
feet and placing on new boots that were a better fit.  He immediately began to walk well
with the new footwear.  The older boots were too small and created some cuts on his
heel ball (not a good situation) and now I had a second problem to address. The next day
Claudia called and  instructed me to wrap his hooves with vet wrap to protect the hoof ball
and then place his new shoes back on his feet.  It had been years since I had to
wrap Ziggy's feet and I knew that one should never wrap too tight or too loose.  There is
a definite "art" to hoof wrapping and I went about the task with some trepidation.  Vet wrap
is a thin flexible stretchy material that clings to itself as one wraps.  Mine was old and very
sticky (think fly paper) and my fingers were not obeying brain signals.  After 3 "variations"
of wrapping and taking shoes on and off, I conquered my humiliation and called my
neighbor again.  She demonstrated how to apply the vet wrap firmly and neatly.   On went
the shoes for the 4th time that day and I felt a great relief.  Living with a horse is a very
humbling experience and large learning curve - which I tell myself everyday. 

New boots

My other rather stressful and disastrous  experience happened during an interview for
an art teaching position that involved a duel credit course in a terrific charter school.
I had been looking forward to teaching in this school for a long time and had subbed
and taught a workshop for them during the last few years.  The staff and administration
at the school are lively, progressive, and very attentive to their students.  My difficulty
involved an interview at a 2 year college that would administer the college credits
to the high schoolers.  I had to be approved by this school for the teaching position.
My original interview was rescheduled for a later date and I was told one other person
(a full-time art instructor), with whom I was an acquaintance, would be at the interview.
I was asked to bring student artwork and present my own work at that time.  No other in-
formation was given to me concerning the interview.  I assumed, then, that it would be
rather informal.

I was almost late to the interview since I had great trouble finding the correct building
(on the not well- marked campus) and the building name was not formally given in the
E-Mail directions.  Arriving in the correct office by sheer will power, I was relieved
the Dean was in a meeting and would see me in a few minutes. That gave me some time
to compose myself after my "run around" the campus and worry about time.

As I was ushered into the conference room, I was surprised to see 4 people sitting around
the table.  I took my seat at the head and was told that each person would be asking me
questions.  I was not asked to talk freely and found myself sitting in a very formal panel
group with a very specific agenda and set of questions.   As the questioning began I looked
out onto very stony faces.  My answers and manner of speaking and thinking were not met
with satisfaction as the interviewer continued to "hammer" at me to be more specific about
outcomes and details. 

I have been in many interviews  both formal and less formal and understood that I was
being asked to use a particular language that I call "education speak" that was developed
during the "No Child Left Behind" debacle.  What the group wanted to hear was was an
echo of the very specific words they were programed to use to describe how one would
go about teaching an introductory art course.  I smiled and remained cordial. I spoke and
spoke, and talked about learning process and series of tasks each student must master for
explicit art problems. My language was my own and more nuanced and came directly
from all my many many experiences and years of teaching art in a variety of venues.  No
one heard my explanations because they were listening for the correct educational "buzz
words".

Rather abruptly, the Dean asked to see my student work which was projected on a screen
from a computer.  Each piece of work was listed under a class title such as Drawing I,
Painting I etc.  There seemed to be some confusion about the headings since I was asked
which courses were introductory.  I gave class assignment and media information about
each piece of art work.  The work was very solid and strong and I was proud of how my
students executed the assignments.  Not a word was mentioned about the high quality of
work.  I was asked to show examples of linear perspective and I had some wonderful land-
scape paintings from Painting I that exhibited deep perspective space. The panel wanted
to see perspective drawing and  I made the point that I was not told to bring specific
assignments and did not have them in the large number and variety of work I had put on
the disk.  I have over 20 years of student work and I picked and chose some of the best
examples to present. 

When I walked out the door of the conference room, I was relieved to be free of the
pounding dissatisfaction and unpleasant atmosphere of the room.   I was taught by my
mentor, Dr. Phyliss Kuffler at Rhode Island School of Design, that the most important
aspect of teaching was the communication and trust one sets up with  the students  from
the initial meeting.  Learning would then follow.  Dr. Kuffler was a gracious, warm, and
giving teacher who demanded the best from her students.  Through years of teaching
and discussions with my colleagues I discovered there are many styles of teaching.
Each instructor develops their own methodology as they tackle subject matter.  I
teach with humor, passion, and knowledge and believe the passing on of information is
a complex and personal experience that comes from a teacher's need to help, inform,
and desire success for their students.  As an artist I am constantly reading, exploring
and making work in my studio. My own experiences with my process of working
filter into my teaching.  Dr. Kuffler taught me that the best teachers are also continual
learners.

Needless to say,  I received an E-Mail during the next few days that thanked me for my
time and commented "While you clearly have many strengths, you did not meet a couple
of critical requirements for hiring for our part-time pool.  One of the aspects we evaluate
when we interview for our  pool (is) the ability to clearly articulate the fundamental
principles/learning outcomes for introductory courses.  Additionally, these articulated
outcomes should be linked to the content emphases and teaching approaches in our
introductory courses.  At this time, we are unable to approve you to teach ......."  I was
not surprised but sad that teachers of art today are required (in many institutions) to
teach from rigid scripted notions of educational talking points rather than their
own very valuable and knowledgeable experiences.

As I look forward to other types of work and challenges, I feel fierce about my earned
experiences and look forward to new venues for my art and knowledge.  The shadows
are a wonderful surprise and articulation for me of how artists continue to use instinct
and wonder to traverse the world. 

Continuing On With My Life

Busting Through A Life in Art

"Dance Suite Monoprint, Oil Stick, Absorbent Ground, Graphite, 30"x110", 2004

The tired artist RISD undergraduate at off campus studio in Providence, RI

Me (in the middle), first oil painting of a map of US from imagination

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Before I begin my post this week, I wish to acknowledge how my mothers death, on May1st, has given me an awareness of how the the life and loss of someone dear and close reorients one's thinking and motivations.  Reading through my mother's writings after her death, I discovered how her struggles and joys helped direct her navigation through her life.  As I move towards regaining my own  emotional equilibrium, I feel a solid kinship with my mothers efforts to balance her goals, family, and the world around her.   The experience of losing my mother has made me feel more fierce and empowered about living a full and honest life that fully encompasses; kindness, spirit, curiosity, artmaking, the wonder of nature, family and friends. 

Sifting through old photo albums looking for the photo of my first oil painting (a map of the US painted at age 8), taken at an old firehouse where classes were held for kids, began a journey backward that moved forward as I thought about the decisions I have made that have led me to this point in my life.  Art and animals were part of my environment growing up in and around New York City.  My aunt took me to Miss Effie's Riding Academy on Long Island when I was 3 or 4 years old for lessons, giving me a life long love of horses.  At home we had 13 turtles, iguanas, chameleons, frogs, seahorses, fish, and birds.  Early memories of my grandmother and I at the Metropolitan Museum are very vivid:  I remember looking up into a very large Jackson Pollack seeing immense worlds of swirling movement; feeling amazed viewing the intense colors of Van Gogh's Sunflowers; charmed by the Degas dancer cast in bronze with her lovely tutu; and in awe of Soleri's gold-threaded sun.   

My mother was a horticulturist, flower arranger, and judge for flower shows.  Our basement was full of fantastic objects and mediums such as driftwood, shells, odd shaped forms of wood, clay, paint, and various colored materials, to name a few.  I was always drawing, painting, taking photos or making some small sculptural object.  Later my parents built me a darkroom when I became interested in printing my own photographs.  An early drawing that I repeatedly recreated was a horse in a large corral backed by mountains or mesa land.  I made many versions of this vision.  When I moved to Hernandez, New Mexico years later, I realized that my drawing was a "blueprint" of my life there.  My corral faced west and was just below the mesa and my horse was a reddish brown color with a light mane and tail that emulated the drawing.   I had "drawn" myself into my life.

At Miss Effie's Riding Academy, at age 4

 My life from ages 8-16 also included intensive ballet training.  My teachers were the stars of The New York City Ballet and mainly Russian.  I was a member of The Andre Eglevsky Ballet Company by age 13. At the time I thought that dance would be my career, but my body could not handle the physical stress.  I turned my focus back to fine art and never looked back.  

After receiving my BFA in painting from Rhode Island School of Design in Italy, where I spent my senior year as a European Honors Student, I stayed another year, living and painting in Northern Italy.  I worked for an American family as an au pair in the tiny hamlet of Ortonovo, just above the port of   Carrara. Returning to the States, I moved to Philadelphia and then Boston.   Waitressing became my main occupation as I struggled with my art work making paintings, drawings, and mixed-media works.

My child drawing of my imagined home

The Lisa Series, Ink, Oil Stick, MM, 60"x40"

After briefly returning to RISD to earn my Masters in Art Teaching, I moved to Hoboken, NJ, across the river from Manhattan.  It was in Hoboken that my "art muscles" really kicked in after years of personal study, effort, time in the studio, and, perseverance.

For about 10 years I worked with abstraction on canvas and paper using oil paint and mixed media.  My interests began to move towards figurative structure and I became very  involved in the story of a 6 year old girl who was beaten to death by her illegally adopted father.  The girl's name was Lisa and her father was the lawyer, Joel Steinberg.  Lisa's face peering out at the viewer on the front page of "The New York Post" touched my heart with sadness.  I found the photographer who had taken Lisa's pictures and traded some art works for a number of photographs.  During the next 9 years I developed 3 series of work under the title "Children in Peril": The Lisa Series, The Nightmare Series, and The Throw-A-Ways. As I worked I began to incorporate stuffed animals, dolls, and various media that created what I call "fat paintings", that moved out into space towards the viewer.  At this time I do not have this work on my web site. If anyone is interested in viewing the work, I can send images through E-Mail or set it up on my website for limited viewing. 

Just about the time I concluded my "Children in Peril" body of work, I moved to New Mexico.  I was tired of the cut-throat New York life as an artist and wanted to live in a place of beauty, space, and quiet.  Moving to New Mexico has been wonderful for my soul and heart.  I did have to re-start my art career, but it was worth the price of living a life surrounded by my animals, land, and light. 

Losing Anita

My mother at 5 with flowers

Anita Appel marries David Rolnick

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On May 1, 2012 I lost my mother to bone cancer.  As I write this sentence I am aware that my emotions have not yet caught up with the reality of my loss, as I reside in a cocooned zone that protects me from a deep inner knowledge that my mother no longer walks this earth.  I am not comfortable in this state because it is an all consuming feeling of disconnect.  As time moves me towards her memorial next week, I know living in this strange twilight space will progress toward the realization of her loss.  I am dedicating this week's post to my mother as I reflect about her life and the qualities that made her a unique and special individual to her two daughters, son-in-law, grandson, extended family of cousins, nephews,  nieces and the many people who met and admired her feistiness, intelligence, and sense of humor.  I especially want to thank Ray who cared for her with all his heart, and Ruth, Paul, Ann, and everyone at Avery Crossing who saw her through her last years and gave her comfort.

Anita Georgia Rolnick, born in 1920 in New York City, was a horticulturalist, botanist, avid gardener, and amateur photographer.  Her parents were Ottalie Popper Appel and George Appel.  She had a younger sister, Barbara, called Bobby, who she adored.  Anita went to Chapel Hill University and studied botany.  Plants, flowers, and flower arranging were her lifelong passions as she studied numerous varieties of all kinds of vegetation.  My mother liked digging in the garden better than any other activity except walking trails, discovering new or interesting plants, trees or flowers.   She was also a bit of a "firecracker" and told me often that she joined the army during WWII to "get away" from her mother.  She was a WAC and served Stateside, taking histories of the wounded soldiers at various bases. 

My mother met my father, David Rolnick, on a blind date set up by my Uncle Bernie, Dad's brother.
My father had also been in the war serving as a bombardier in the Air Force. He was shot down over Germany and survived a German POW camp.  My parents became engaged and planned their wedding.  During that era in the late 1940's, engaged couples had chaperones when they went away together.  My mother used to joke that the chaperones were more "naughty" than she and my father and were actually quite useless.  

The married couple settled on Long Island, outside of New York City, in the town of Valley Stream with an infant daughter - me.  My sister, Lynn, arrived 2 years later and we became the somewhat typical nuclear post WWII family.  Except my mother was not exactly the typical mother of that period.  Early on in their marriage, my mother had all her new in-laws over for a turkey dinner.  At this time she did not know much about cooking.  Unfortunately something "happened" to the turkey and everyone became violently ill.  The family story blames the fact that my mother covered the turkey with aluminum foil and that "poisoned" the turkey. My mother later became an excellent and inventive cook and baker.   I am sure this "incident" helped spur her beginning ventures into cooking.

 My mother was a small person, just under 5 feet.  One day I was looking out the window and noticed her working in the garden.  Something seemed familiar and then I noticed she was wearing my old green jeans and pink ski jacket.  My mom was wearing my hand-me-downs!  She coordinated the outfit with her green rubber garden boots.  A similar situation occurred with my little red wagon.  When I was very young, my parents brought me a bright red wagon to pull.  I used it for quite a while until it was time to learn how to ride a bicycle.  The little red wagon did not stay in the garage for long as my mother began using it to move her plants around the property.  She used that wagon until it gave out and then bought another more sturdy style.  

During the winter there were certain activities that the family enjoyed every year when my sister and I were young.  Our house was a block away from a park and small lake and we would have skating parties most weekends with my mothers's sister, Bobby, and her family and various friends.  Both sisters loved to skate. Years later when I was in high school, located across the lake, I sat day-dreaming in English class one day and turned my head to glance out the window.  A singular figure was gliding across the ice.  I looked closer and saw it was my mother in her special Dutch outfit, a blue wool fitted jacket and pants with her pointy hat on her head, moving in her own world by herself.  She seemed so contained and peaceful.   My mother also insisted we go to the beach every winter to collect the conch shells that only washed up during the colder months.  She bundled us all up and out we went to Jones Beach.  We were the only people on the beach since it was windy, damp, and freezing cold.  But we also had plenty of conch shells.  My mother used them in her flower arrangements and kept a "stash" in a box under her work table in the basement.

One of the main heartaches of my mother's life was the loss of her sister, Bobby, at age 34 from cancer.   She was devastated for a very long time.  Our very tight family was changed forever when my Aunt Bobbie died. 

After my college years I moved to Philadelphia and worked as an artist and waitressed in a variety of restaurants.  One morning I was woken up early by a phone call from my mother on Long Island.  She told me she needed to take a break from my father and sister (who was living at home at the time) and was coming right away to stay with me.  I was completely taken by surprise by this sudden act of flight by my mother who was not prone to rash acts. Two hours later she was at my door.  At this time I lived in a 4th floor walk-up in Center City.  I had a mattress on the floor and no real furniture.   Since I was working that evening, I took my mother to the restaurant and sat her at my station in a comfortable booth and had all my fellow workers stop by and say hello.  She loved the attention and the dinner.  I slept on the floor that night and gave her the bed.  The next morning she was out the door as fast as she had entered. 


Years later when my parents moved to Needham, MA to be near my sister's family, they began to spend four months of the year in Tuscon, AZ.  My mother loved the West and quickly learned where all the wonderful hiking trails were located.  She was especially fond of Sabino Canyon where my parents walked almost everyday.  My mother became very familiar with the vegetation and terrain of Sabino, noticing changes every year to her favorite Saguaro's.  She was always ready to head up the trail and keep walking and it was often hard to keep up with her.   My father and mother also became very interested in photography and showed their landscapes in many venues including the Audubon Society.  On the trip home from Tuscon to Needham, my parents would stop and visit me in New Mexico.  My mother loved my home here in Edgewood and was always amazed at the number of animals that lived on my land.  During one of their last visits here, my mother insisted on helping me muck up my horse arena.  It is a large pen-at least an acre.  I gave her one of my manure rakes and she gave it her all.  She was slightly awkward at the task and I found that very touching as she worked with me until the corral was clean. 

During her years in Needham, my mother began to design and plant my sister's garden.  The garden today is a testament to her skills and knowledge of plants, pattern, and color.  When she and my father moved to Avery Crossing Assisted Living near-by, she began a campaign to develop a raised garden on the property.  The garden club of Needham helped build the garden and my mother worked on that project until she was too frail to work outdoors.  Her design and garden can be seen today in a beautiful spot that stands as a tribute and dedication to a woman who loved digging in the earth to bring forth the beauty and science of nature.  Her mind, wit, and strength of character remained strong to the end of her life.  I will miss her everyday and I was fortunate to learn and be guided by her independent mind, love of nature, and strong sense of humanity and care of others.

David and Anita in Tuscon

Bobby and Anita

                                                                            

Clemitis taken by Anita